Throughout our lives girls are told to “look pretty” by our parents, siblings, grandparents, friends, and pretty much all of society. At this point, what does “look pretty” even mean?

Is it against the Feminine Code of Conduct for me wear my favorite pair of sweats because they don’t hug my hips and squeeze my thighs like skinny jeans do? Or that I can’t NOT wear makeup or throw on a baggy sweatshirt?

No, there is no written code, but due to our society’s culture, a girl in a big hoodie and windbreaker pants isn’t “pretty” enough.

But it is pretty.

Because pretty is who we are when we feel most comfortable. When we are comfortable in our skin because we’re not being squeezed by our clothes. And if you feel most comfortable in skinny jeans and a nice t-shirt? Then you’re beautiful in that too.

But when you rate us, that makes girls feel that they aren’t enough. It makes us feel that we aren’t validated enough because we could be better.

I get that some of you guys think it may be funny, or even harmless.

But, trust me, it’s not.

At this age, some girls are very insecure about the way they look because they don’t look like the model they saw in Vanity Fair magazine. But girls, we can’t let ourselves be defined by a number. We are more than that, and we won’t be minimized because of this.

Yeah, we talk about how his abs are great to look at, or how that guys hair looks extremely good styled the way it is, or even how good looking he is overall. Girls may even tell their friend how that guy in 4th period is cute. But it’s a private conversation, one that we’re discussing with our friends and trying to keep on the downlow.

And because girls do it, you may think it’s not that bad, right?

Wrong. I know we’re not going to change the male mindset of what they should or can do. So ladies, let’s just stop listening. Let their numbers float above your head and disappear into a cloud of dust.

As females, we know what it means to be degraded, even if it’s never happened to us. It’s happened to someone that we know, or we’ve heard through the grapevine. It affects everyone: girls, guys, doesn’t matter.

The solution is so easy, it’s pretty much a no-brainer.

We should all respect each other enough to not be overly judge-y and hurt anyone’s feelings.

Now, remember this: Your body is uniquely you and there’s nothing you can do to change that. But, everybody has different types, so just because you’re not your crush’s type doesn’t mean no one will want you, for every cup there’s a saucer. And what guys may find attractive, doesn’t always make it into a relationship. Just like you have a type, boys will have types too. We all just need to okay with that.